Characteristics of a Godly Friend According to the Bible

What’s Inside: Learn how to choose your friends wisely with this blog article about the characteristics of a godly friend

“A friend is one who overlooks your broken fence and admires the flowers in your garden.”

We don’t know who penned those beautiful words, but we know they ring true. We all want a friend who can overlook things we need to improve upon, and see the potential of what we are and what we can be.

A true friend is one who we can be ourselves with and they celebrate our uniqueness with us. And dare I say it… they embrace our weirdness.

Life would be lonesome without true friendship.

Do you have a godly christian best friend like that?

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Choosing Good Friends is Important

We all want good Christian friends and having them is important for several reasons. Good friends provide emotional support, companionship, and a sense of belonging. They also provide valuable advice to help navigate difficult situations. Statistics show that that good friends help you make healthier choices.

Good friends provide emotional support, companionship, and a sense of belonging

Having a strong social support network has also been linked to better mental and physical health outcomes. On the other hand, poor quality friendships or a lack of friends can lead to feelings of isolation and loneliness, which can have negative effects on mental and physical health. Therefore, it is important to choose friends who are trustworthy, respectful, and supportive, and to nurture those godly friendships.

I surveyed 16 Christian women in 2 Facebook groups asking them what they consider the qualities of a good christian friend are. The answers probably won’t surprise you- because we all are looking and yearning for real friends with all of these qualities. Even loyal friends.

Here’s what they look for in a good Christian friend:

• Keep you accountable
• Listens in good and bad times
• Gives you truthful advice
• Receives advice even though we don’t agree (doesn’t lashback)
• Obedient to God’s Word
• Walks the walk
• Speak in grace but truthful when sinning
• Being compassionate
• Being confidential
• Having a heart full of wisdom
• Being empathetic
  Prays for you and with you
• Is always honest
• Always be humble
• Always be kind
• Leads by example
• Just always being there
• Knowing you can share without it being gossipped
• Being reliable

Thank you to D’Edra, Guadalupe, Carolyn, Starla, Emily, Ginnie, Sharon, Sonia, Jenna, Kelly, Rinda, Donna, Amanda, Pat, Marie and Cheryl for sharing what you think are the qualities of a biblical friendship are.

When I was young, I chose friends who lived on the edge and who liked to party. It was fun and exciting. These weren’t the types of friendships that fostered good character or the qualities of a godly friendship.

The sad truth is that those friends did not have my best interest at heart. Would you believe that the Bible even talks about how we should treat those in the household of faith- and we should use those Scriptures as a foundation on how we choose our friends.

Let’s take a look at the book of Proverbs, chapter and verse 12:26 in the New King James Version.

The righteous should choose his friends carefully, For the way of the wicked leads them astray.

Proverbs 12:26 New King James Version

The NKJV states that the righteous should choose his friends carefully. The word choose in the Hebrew is from the word that can be translated as being cautious or to reconnoiter. Reconnoiter means to make a military observation and is a word that takes on military nuances. Is it any wonder?

The second half of the verse is eye opening. The way of the wicked leads those who choose ungodly friends astray. Choosing godly friends ensures that our life will be surrounded by those who want to see us succeed in our faith.

Choosing godly friends ensures that our life will be surrounded by those who want to see us succeed in our faith

True Friendship Can Only Be Found in Jesus

True friendship can only be found through an intimate relationship with Jesus Christ because He is the ultimate example of God’s love and selflessness.

The qualities of Christian friendship mentioned below provide the stable foundation of the kind of friendship that will stand the test of time.

When Jesus was speaking to His disciples in Jerusalem, he was getting read to partake in the last supper with them and He spoke a truth that would foretell his dying on the cross…

Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.

John 15:13

True love involves selflessness and a willingness to give oneself up for others.

Jesus is the example of true friendship because He was willing to give up everything for his friends- he even gave his life for them by paying the ultimate sacrifice.

Traits of a Godly Friend

Let’s take a look at some of the traits of a godly friend using specifically chosen Bible verses from both the Old and New Testament.

She Corrects in Love

Open rebuke is better than secret love. Faithful are the wounds of a friend; but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.

Proverbs 27:5-6

King Solomon is saying in Proverbs 27:5-6 means that it is better to confront someone and tell them when they have done something wrong, rather than keeping it to yourself and pretending that everything is okay. This verse is emphasizing the importance of honesty and direct communication in relationships, rather than allowing issues to go sour, fester and grow. It’s important to address problems as soon as they arise, in order to maintain a healthy and strong relationship.

She Has Your Best Interest at Heart

As we have therefore opportunity, let us do good unto all men, especially unto them who are of the household of faith.

Galatians 6:10

In Galatians 6:10, the Apostle Paul was writing to the Galatians telling them they should take advantage of every opportunity to do good to others, especially to those who are members of the family of God.

She Forgives

Forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye.

Colossians 3:13

She Loves at All Times

A friend loveth at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.

Proverbs 17:17

This one might seem pretty obvious, but a friend loves. Love is the foundation of a close friendship. Proverbs 17:17a means that a real friend show love, even in difficult times. And a brother, is someone who will help and support you in difficult times and will be there for you when you are going through hardships. This verse highlights the importance of having loyal and supportive relationships in one’s life.

She Goes with You During Adversity

A friend loveth at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.

Proverbs 17:17

Proverbs 17:17 emphasizes the importance of having close relationships with people who will be there for you during hard times, who will help you through hard situations and be your companion in adversity. They are literally there to help in times of adversity. How reassuring is that! It’s a great reminder that true friendship and brotherhood is deeper than just being together in good times, but also are there when things are really difficult in life.

She Has Fervent Love

And above all things have fervent charity among yourselves: for charity shall cover the multitude of sins

1 Peter 4:8

The first portion of 1 Peter 4:8 means that it is important to have a strong, passionate love for one another who are Christian believers. The Greek word translated as “charity” here is “agape,” which refers to a selfless, unconditional love. This verse is encouraging believers to have a deep and genuine love for one another, regardless of their differences or faults. It emphasizes the importance of unity and brotherhood among the believers and encourages to be compassionate, understanding and supportive to one another.

She Overlooks Sin

And above all things have fervent charity among yourselves: for charity shall cover the multitude of sins

1 Peter 4:8b

1 Peter 4:8b isn’t a license to overlook willful sin. It means that when people have genuine, selfless love for one another, it can help to cover over and forgive mistakes and wrongs that may occur within the body of Christ. If there are sinful shortcomings, we know that God is able to speak to the heart to forsake sin. As mentioned above charity is translated as “agape,” which refers to a selfless, unconditional love. When people truly love one another, they are more likely to overlook each other’s faults and mistakes, and be more forgiving and understanding. Having a heart full of charity makes it easier to forgive and to extend grace. Having Holy Spirit born charity builds strong relationships and friendshp.

She Gives Good Advice

Ointment and perfume rejoice the heart: so doth the sweetness of a man’s friend by hearty counsel.

 Proverbs 27:9

In Bible times, the pleasant aroma of ointment and perfume brought joy and happiness to the heart. They were both very expensive commodities, The verse is using the metaphor of ointment and perfume to describe something that brings pleasure and delight to the senses. The use of ointment and perfume in ancient times was used for medicinal, ritual and aesthetic purposes, it is common in the Bible to use these elements to describe the richness and luxury of a person’s life. Just as these two luxuries brought joy to a life, the advice of a trustworthy friend is cherished by the one receiving it.

She Encourages

Wherefore comfort yourselves together, and edify one another, even as also ye do.

1 Thessalonians 5:11

The verse is saying that believers should comfort and encourage each other, and build each other up in their faith. “Comfort” in this verse refers to offering words of encouragement and reassurance, while “edify” refers to building up or strengthening someone in their faith. This verse encourages the members of the Christian church to support each other in their spiritual growth and is a call for mutual support, care and encouragement among the believers.

She Restores

Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted.

Galatians 6:1

The verse means that if a believer within is found to be committing a sin, those who are more spiritually mature should help that person to turn away from their sin and return to righteousness. The verse is encouraging those who are more mature in their faith to “restore” or bring back the person who has fallen into sin, in a spirit of humility and gentleness. The idea is to help the person see their mistake, feel remorse, and make amends, rather than to condemn or judge them. The verse also reminds those who are helping to restore the person, to be mindful of their own faults and temptations, so they should approach the situation with humility and not be tempted to judge or look down on the person who has fallen. This verse is emphasizing the importance of forgiveness, compassion and understanding when it comes to dealing with sin.

She Puts Others First

Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves.

Philippians 2:3

This verse is encouraging humility and a lack of self-importance. Believers in the Lord should not act out of a desire for personal achievement or glory, but instead should act in a way that values others above themselves. The verse is encouraging people to act with humility, and to avoid actions that might cause conflict or division.

She is Kind to Others

Does good to all, but especially to those who are in the family of faith.

And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not. As we have therefore opportunity, let us do good unto all men, especially unto them who are of the household of faith.

Galatians 6:9-10

This verse encourages perseverance and continuance to do good works, despite any difficulties that may arise. It is saying that if we do not become tired or give up, we will ultimately be rewarded for our sacrifice. It also highlights the importance of doing good to all people, with a special emphasis on helping those within the Christian community. We should not become discouraged or stop doing good when things are not going well. Our good works have a spiritual reward, and our actions can help others and bring glory to God.

She is Compassionate

And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.

Ephesians 4:32

The verse is emphasizing the importance of treating others with kindness and forgiveness, just as God has forgiven us through our Jesus Christ. It is a reminder that, as believers, we are called to live according to God’s standard of love and forgiveness. It is a call to imitate God in our interactions with others and to be a reflection of His love and kindness in the world.

She Sharpens Your Faith

Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend.

Proverbs 27:17

Proverbs 27:17 is a biblical verse that is often interpreted to mean that just as iron sharpens iron by rubbing against it, so too do people sharpen one another by interacting with each other and challenging each other to grow and improve in God. Through the process of iron sharpening iron, people help each other improve, becoming more like iron that is sharpened. When iron rubs against iron, it produces sparks, it removes the impurities and burrs and becomes sharper. By using the same principle in friendships, people should encourage and challenge each other to grow in the Lord and become more like Him.

Being a godly friend according to the Bible is about much more than just being a good person or a good listener. It is about being someone who is deeply rooted in God and who is committed to living according to God’s will and Word.

We must be intentional about developing the godly characteristics of kindness, compassion, and forgiveness , and to be willing to put the needs of others before our own.

Remember: to be a true friend , you must emulate the nature of God according to His Word in your relationships.

In review, the characteristics of a godly friend according to the Bible verses I chose to share today are:

• She corrects in love
• She has your best interest at heart
• She forgives
• She Loves at all times
• She Goes with you During Adversity
• She Has Fervent Love
• She Overlooks Sin
• She gives Good Advice
• She Encourages
• She Restores
• She Puts Others First
• She is Kind
• She is Compassionate
• She Sharpens your Faith

Like any relationship, a good friendship isn’t built in a day.

The qualities mentioned above aren’t a list that we tick off like a resume while looking for new Christian friends. We aren’t all perfectly glorified believers and we make mistakes. If we or else we would be in heaven. God’s gift to us isn’t a good reward based on our own behavior. We are worth keeping only because of God’s love.

Pray and ask God to show you their character and that you have a friendship centered in the Lord.

May God give you the Christian best friend your heart desires and craves.